Friday, April 9, 2010

WOW!!! What and extremely rough week this has been! I was so excited to get Gavin out here to get this treatment, I just had the best feeling about it and all the research I did confirmed that we needed to be here! In saying that.... I got so discouraged, Thinking that maybe, just maybe I made the wrong choice for my son! He is so little and so young and depends on ME to make the right choices for him! This treatment was more painful then I could have ever imagined (not as bad as I prepared myself for, which is good!) I started meeting so many families out here, so many little kids that have gone through or are getting this 3F8 treatment and at that point i wondered, Is this worth it?.?.? These last two days were really rough on him. He asked me how I could let "them" do this to him and told me he couldn't do it anymore. Today, the last round of 3F8 in the 1st cylce, was REALLY hard. He only had about 5 minutes of pain but it seems like it was the worst out of each of the days. He even went as far to ask me if he was dying.... It was so hard, knowing that the choice -I- made put him in that bed to endure such pain!!!! I was really re-thinking things until, I got on a website called Band of Parents ( to do somemore research and reasure myself that we are doing the right thing and let me tell you.... That helped me KNOW, FOR SURE that this is where we MUST be to get him through this! Although the pain is rough and it's so hard to see your baby go through this... It's gonna make THE differance! It helped boost me back up, refreshed my memory and reasured me, I am doing right by him! I ask each one of you to go check out that website... It's such an eye opener and, for my Gavin, I will be doing donations to them and I would love to do a fundraiser for them someday to help raise money to find a cure for this Evil Monster they call Neuroblastoma!!!

Friday, April 2, 2010

This boy makes it ALL worth it!!!!

I woke up this morning feeling a bit down, a little depressed and so lonely. Gavin slept in late which gave me way too much time to think! When this amazing little man woke up the first thing he asked me was... "Mom, what's the black sonic's name?" Bet you can't guess what he was dreaming!!! Anyway, Just with that and his sweet little voice it pulled me, semi, out of the funk I woke up in!!! I decided to get him up. We went down to the kitchen for some lunch and then we went to the Central Park Zoo! This is what keeps me going! This little man and his amazing spirit, smile & strength!!! He is truely MY little HERO!!!!